Everything

And I still lie to me, in front of our indulgent conversation about all with no specific details, losing games, I would shyly dare the years to go by. It is so hard to grow even older and to realise the worst is due to come yet. In the background, I could still hear the hum of a thousand old fashioned songs coming in the air, even sometimes only on my mind.

I had hidden the truth so well, pretending to be impasible while my desires runned towards him and expected to catch his eyes and mind somehow just for an instant. Probably he was not interested or not aware at all of my subtle and poor intentions, in fact had never been on any of them. I probably was a mere entertainment for a couple of hours maximum and a suitable opportunity to be invited to lunch or to have a drink while I adored trying to keep on knowing about him as much as he ever would like to show me in those sometimes.

Let my last word lost not to chain his soul, not be noticed very much, while my violent unspoken love fades away for him to be free.